How to Have Sex for the First Time Tips Kenya

Last Updated on 22/12/2021 by Steve Wanjie

How to have sex for the first time tips is answer to this question; “how do I start sex for the first time?” 

These tips are helpful to you, the beginner who has never had sex before.

This is a beginners guide to sex for a better and enjoyable first time love making experience.


“Sex is emotion in motion”

Mae West

Before the internet, there was little information on sex or the art of lovemaking.

Nobody taught or provided sex education to beginners like you.

Young adults had no idea how to go about it hence the stress, bad experiences, and rape.

You simply didn’t know anything so the beginning was always rough especially on the girl.

Women have suffered in Africa

To date, most rural African women have never experienced the enjoyment of having pure, high-quality, and satisfying sex because their men do not know about what love-making is all about.

You, the man, was not taught so women should not start blaming you, because you are sexually unschooled.

Boys thought having sex is about grabbing a girl, removing her panty, and penetrating her vagina right away.

That is rape, it is very painful, crude, and traumatizing, but did boys born before 1980 in rural Africa know this?

I bet not because sex education was unheard of then.

But the man has also suffered at the hands of women who have no idea how to make love.

Some women think sex is about undressing, lie on their back, and spread their legs.

The rest is left to the man.

They just lie there like a piece of wood, no movement, no touching, and no communication at all.

“We are all born sexual creatures, thank God, but it’s a pity so many people despise and crush this natural gift.”

Marilyn Monroe

Why you should have sex?

As a beginner, you might be wondering if it is right to have sex.

Yes, it is your right to have sex for the reasons stated below.

God created sex for various reasons including procreation.

“The difference between sex and love is that sex relieves tension and love causes it.”

Woody Allen

Here are the reasons to have sex:

Sex is vital for your health

  • It helps you sleep better
  • It relieves stress
  • It helps burn calories hence helping in weight loss
  • It provides women with a good skin
  • It improves cardiovascular health – keeps your heart happy
  • It helps increase immunity
  • It slows aging in men and women
  • Orgasms relieve pain and aches in women – headaches cure
  • It increases blood circulation for both sexes
  • Body fitness – It is an excellent exercise activity
  • Helps renew brain cells – i.e., sharpens your mind
  • It is good for mental health

Sex is for pleasure

  • It makes you feel good
  • It keeps you happy

Sex is for intimacy

  • It helps build emotional intimacy between man and woman
  • Helps bond you to your partner

Sex is for procreation as in making babies

  • It helps bring new human life into this world – babies

 Sex is an art that every beginner must learn

Sex or love-making is an art.

The tools for enjoyable sex are your hands, fingers, lips, tongue, and sex toys.

A man who knows how to use sex tools is a darling to his sex partner.

It doesn’t matter whether you are poor, rich, ugly or, whatever.

If you can deliver the enjoy in the bedroom, you will have all the women to yourself.

Women talk about sex and men’s performance in bed a lot.

Thus, if a man is good, many women will know sooner.

Sex is a very important art that you must learn for your own seek and that of your sex partner.

Sex is happiness in a fulfilling relationship.

Know the sexual organ for the opposite sex

You need to know the biology of your sexual partner’s genitalia because it is necessary.

A man must know where the clitoris, G spot, vagina, etc., are located within a woman’s genitalia.

Likewise, for a woman, you need to have adequate knowledge of the male genitals.

Image showing the location of the clitoris n a female genitalia - How to Have Sex for the First Time
Female external genitals – credit: theppgstore.com
male genitalia
male genitalia

How to Have Sex for the First Time Tips for beginners

  1. Masturbation – Know your body first

Masturbation helps you learn your body through exploration.

You need to know which parts of your body turn you on when caressed (or touched.)

You need to know your erogenous zones.



When having sex with your boyfriend you will be able to tell them where to touch you for maximum pleasure.

Good sex includes communication during sex.

A woman must know how to direct her man during a loving-making session.

You need to discover all the places on your body that when touched you get turned on.

There are parts of your body that you may not be comfortable with when touched.

That is the reason you must explore and learn your body.

This helps direct your sex partner accurately when you are having fun in the bedroom.


Masturbation helps you learn how to make love to your girlfriend the right way.

It helps you learn how to hold (or delay) ejaculation for long so your woman may enjoy it.

Otherwise, you may release sperm in 2 minutes which may make the girl very unhappy.

Masturbation will help you learn how to thrust.

This is a major problem with many men because they don’t know how to control thrusting to prolong intercourse.

2. Talk to your sex partner about having sex for the first time

It is very important, to tell the truth about your sex experience.

Let your sex partner know that you are having sex for the first time. My God this is crucial.

It removes guilt, and embarrassment when things fail to work in the right way.


Because having sex for the first time is awkward.

You are nervous because you have no experience and the pressure to please your partner is on.

You will fable, fail and sweat.

You will realize that it isn’t that easy to make love for the first time.

This is especially true if both of you a trying it for the first time.

So, say to your partner; “I have never had sex before.” That statement sets you free.

No stress and no pressure to please them. After all, they are aware it’s your first time. You have no experience. It is romantic and pleasing to your partner that they are your first.

3. Agree on the venue for your first time to have sex

Very few people forget their first time.

It is a memory worthy keeping especially if it goes smoothly.

Where will it happen? You need to discuss this with your sex partner.

What type of venue do you need for your first time to have sex?

  • You need a venue where it is safe to have sex.
  • The venue must be quiet
  • There must be no disturbance
  • It must be a venue that provides total privacy
  • The venue needs to be warm because ladies hate cold places

. 4. How to set the crime scene for your first time to have sex

  • The room must be clean with fresh air circulation enabled
  • You need a strong bed
  • The bed must have fresh clean bed sheets
  • Dim romantic color lighting
  • Low volume sexy and romantic music should be playing
  • Have condoms ready for protection – safe sex
  • Have some sex toys ready in case you need them
  • Massage oil

5. Foreplay leads to best sex for beginners

Foreplay is mandatory for sex enjoyment.

It is the only way to prepare your partner for sex.

Soccer players warm up before playing football.

The body must be warmed up adequately in order to perform at its pick.

Likewise, in love-making, you use foreplay to warm up and prepare your woman or man for sex.


This is because you need to be sexually aroused to enjoy sex.

The more you are aroused, the more you will enjoy sex.

How do you arouse your partner?

The 3 ways you should use to arouse your partner to get them ready for sexual intercourse are:

  • Caressing

Touch with your fingers; lick using your tongue and caress using your palm.

Caress them all over their body.

Touch all the places that turn them on according to their communication.

Touch every inch of their skin with your fingers, tongue, and palm. Take your time and be patient.

Ladies especially take along to be turned on.

At this stage ignore the genitals and the breasts.

You will pay attention to these organs later.

Alternate caressing with kissing.

You can kiss any part of the body including the forehead, the neck, ears, stomach, etc.

  • Give her or him a massage

Massaging is one of the best ways to give a perfect arousal effect.

Massage is done all over the body.

It is relaxing, it is enjoyable, and it is the best form of foreplay.

Massaging is romantic and it shows your partner that you care about them.

  • Oral sex is the normal thing in the 21st century

Use your tongue and fingers to provide oral sex.

Women love it when their man goes down on them.

Stimulate the clitoris with your tongue and your fingers.

Remember the massaging oil has made your fingers oily and thus can’t hurt her clit.

You can use your tongue on her clit and your fingers to stimulate her G Spot at the same time.

The G Spot is located inside the vagina but very close to the entrance at the upper side.

  • Make use of sex toys

Sex toys are the tools for modern love-making formulas.

For sex satisfaction, sex toys must be involved in pleasing your partner sexually.

Some of the leading super sex toys for women are found here.

Learn how to give oral sex to your sex partner.

It is important to have this skill because you need to always satisfy your woman or man sexually.

After oral sex now you can proceed to real vaginal penetration sex because both of you are adequately aroused.

The boy gives the girl oral sex and the girl does the same to the boy.

Now you are both ready for sexual intercourse.

6. Best sex position for beginners

The missionary position:

Having sexual intercourse using missionary sex position
Having sexual intercourse using missionary sex position

This is the safest sex position and therefore widely used across the globe.

Otherwise, people do get nasty penis or vaginal injuries when experimenting on sex positions.

You don’t want injuries to your sex organ when having sex for the first time.

This is the only sex position I would recommend for sex beginners because it is simple and easy to use.

How to use the missionary sex position:

  • The girl lies on her back with a pillow under her hip with legs spread out
  • The boy on top of the girl supporting himself with his elbows
  • The boy uses his fingers to locate the vaginal entrance
  • Having located the vaginal entrance you guide your penis to the vagina opening
  • You, the boy then penetrates the vagina slowly and gradually

7. How to have sexual intercourse for the first time

  • The vagina must be wet or lubricated
  • The penis must be erect and hard
  • The penis penetrates the vagina slowly and gradually to avoid a painful penetration
  • You begin with slow and shallow thrusts – in and out of the vagina
  • Go ten slow shallow thrusts and then one deep thrust
  • Increase the thrusting speed a little bit avoiding going deep into the vagina
  • Now go deep and stop thrusting. Slide your body upwards so your pubic bone rests on her pubic bone. Then start grinding in order to stimulate her clitoris. Keep kissing on the lips as you grind.
  • Then start thrusting again. Shallow and slow and gradually increase speed and depth.
  • Eventually, go deep thrusting as you increase speed. Don’t stop. Thrust deep, hard, strong, fast, and a bit rough. You may bring her legs and rest them on your shoulders.  This will allow for deep (in and out) speedy thrusts
  • You will both climax at the same time

8. What to do after having sex for the first time

  • Lie in bed and cuddle
  • Kiss
  • Talk about your experience with sex for the first time
  • Take your time in bed to rest
  • Go at it again if both have the energy
  • If not ready for another round you get up
  • Clean the outer area of your genitals with warm water – no soap
  • Girls should never clean the inside of the vagina – it itself cleans naturally
  • Girls should pee after having sex
  • Drink a glass of water


Having sex for the first time need not be a stressful thing.

All you need is a loving partner and proper planning.

You need to be over 18 years old and ready to be accountable for anything that happens after the encounter.

People get pregnant and that is a result you must take responsibility if it happens.

It is a good thing to have protected first-time sex to avoid accident negative effects of making love.

The first time is mostly awkward, so don’t get embarrassed, or stressed about it.

Thanks for your visit

Steve Wanjie

The Founder:




Does masturbation affect sex


First time sex tips

By Steve Wanjie

Steve Wanjie is a digital marketing specialist, SEO Expert, expert article writer, blogger, sex educationist, and businessman. He is the founder of Dijito Marketing and Laikipo.com. He works and lives in Nairobi Kenya.


Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.